Have you ever been told you did something well, or looked nice, and said “thank you” but secretly couldn’t feel good inside? Do you have a “successful” life or career on the outside, but have times when you just feel so small on the inside? Like many of you, I have had those experiences in the past, and I’ve heard from others who have shared that experience. How many more feel this but don’t say? My experience suggests a great number.

In a bid to help change people’s lives, whatever their background, I studied counselling, NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) and many modern day philosophers and have learned that these feelings often result from the way we were brought up as children. We were brought up to “behave” and to gain our parent’s, teachers and other authority’s approval. But we were often not taught to approve of ourselves. This leads us, and our children, to seek external approval throughout our lives and can leave a big hole of low self esteem where self love and self affirmation should reside.

I believe our children should learn at an early age that we are the only ones that really know what we have achieved, how hard we have tried, and that each and every one of us has many beautiful qualities. Therefore we are the best cheerleader we can have. I also believe that as children and adults, the greater our self confidence, the better our life will be around us – we will attract nicer, more positive people and things into our lives, and more easily shrug off the negatives like grumpy bosses or a classroom taunt.

In “Daphne and the Smiley Shells”, a book I am developing,  I have embedded some simple NLP techniques to help you and your children increase your inner feelings of self worth, and attract more positive experiences into your life. Available in October, this story and the practices it provides will help both your inner and outer worlds become brighter, happier and more fulfilling!

How do you see yourself being your own cheerleader in the future? Please post your ideas below.

Vicki